Sunday, April 12, 2009

In loving Memory

This past Friday, one of my good friends passed away. Some of know her as Barbara, her real name. Other's might have read her blog and knew her as Heidi. Barbara was one of the most generous and kind individuals I have ever known. I never met her in person, but I don't think that mattered. I loved "talking" to her over emails and sharing book thoughts. As you have noticed I'm hosting the Cozy mystery challenge this year (and have for a couple of years). Guess who got me hooked on that genre? Yup, Barbara. She introduced me to so many authors and was so generous with books. We read a lot of the same series and it wasn't uncommon for her to email me and tell me not to buy the next book in whatever series because she was going to send it to me when she was finished. I always thanked her and would send her handmade cards and I know I sent her a gift card once. But even so, I don't know if she ever realized just how much I appreciated that. Books are my hobby, as they were hers. However as most of you know I enjoy collecting the books I read (and plan to read). My husband would rather save all that money than spend it on books. Barbara knew that and she was always willing to send me books she knew or thought I would enjoy. I truly appreciated this.

I wrote a long note in the sympathy card I'm sending her family. In it I touched on a conversation we had not too long ago. I knew her through a yahoo group we were both a part of. One day somebody (heck, it could have been me, I don't remember) mentioned using a kitchen aid mixer and how much they loved it. That's the brand I use and I do love it. I remember Barbara said she had one, but hated it. She had another brand she used instead. I remember either thinking or possibly writing "Barbara! How could you NOT love your kitchen aid mixer!!! They are wonderful!". Well, today I was baking a cake. I love to bake and when I'm sad, it helps cheer me up. So I've been sad about Barbara's passing and not being able to go to the funeral or meet the family to tell them just how much she was loved. Since it was Easter, I knew I had family I could pawn my cake off on. So I'm making my cake from scratch, using my kitchen aid mixer. I remembered how Barbara hated the kitchen aid mixer she had at one point. It made me smile, because here I am using my kitchen aid mixer to help Cheer me up about her passing, when she hated kitchen aid mixers. haha! I have a feeling I'll remember that often. I know, not the funniest thing, but to me it's a good memory and one I'll cherish.

So for those who are participating in my cozy mystery challenge, if you are of the praying type, please say a prayer for her family when you review one of the cozy mysteries. Barbara wasn't old, she was only 53, and this was sudden and unexpected. In fact, as I'm writing this, I believe the family still doesn't know exactly what caused her to be so sick. So please keep them in your thoughts, they just lost one hell of a wife/daughter/mother/grandmother.

10 comments:

Joy said...

I'm really sorry you have lost your blogging friend, Kris. I didn't know Barbara, but she sure sounds like a great person.

bermudaonion said...

I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend.

Kristie said...

What a beautiful post about Barbara. She was such a warm and open person who really made me feel welcome. Today marks the end of the NHL season and the playoffs start Wednesday. Last year it was down to my Red Wings and Barbara's beloved Penguins and we had a friendly wager. I will miss her so much. You couldn't have said it better... her family did lose a hell of a wife/mother/grandmother and the blogging community lost one hell of a member. Rest in peace Barbara and know that we all miss you but remember you with a smile.

Taminator said...

This is a lovely tribute to Barbara. I know she would be embarrassed (in a good way!) but proud to know she'd touched all of us so much. I miss her.

Rachel said...

it's good of you to immortalize Barbara in this way Kris.. Some people won't understand but we do.. I do.. I feel great sadness with her passing.. Thanks for this..

-rachel

Beth F said...

Kris, I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. My thoughts are with you and I'll think of you and Barbara as I complete the cozy challenge.

Tea said...

Kris,

What beautiful words about a friend. I didn't get to know Barbara. Still, I felt so sad knowing she had passed. It's good to learn so much about her through you. I will remember her family like you asked.

Kris said...

Thank you everyone. I'm reading this at work and your comments made me get all teary eyed. Not a good thing at work, but shows how much I appreciate all the kind words you said.

Dorte H said...

I am so sorry you have lost a friend, and that a family has lost their mother far too early.
And no matter what you think yourself, I think she must have felt that she meant a lot to you. And it is certainly a wonderful memorial you have written for her.

Literary Feline said...

What a wonderful tribute, Kris. I did a couple of my own to her over the past couple of weeks as her health was failing. I do hope the doctors are able to figure out what caused her death.

She really was a wonderful person. I feel so lucky to have had the time I did with her, even if it was only online through reading groups and her blog.

My thoughts and prayers are with her family at this time.